2006-02-01 - 5:03 p.m.

Have you ever had a friend that you were once so tight with you told them everything? Then something happened and you weren’t such good friends. Maybe they got married, or had kids or started dating some guy you thought was a complete assclown, and your whole friendship changed. You were still friends but not as close as you once were.

I just had a forty minute conversation with a friend from years ago. And for the entire forty minutes she just kept saying, “Hmmm what else can I tell you about me? What else is happening with me?” She was at my wedding but never asked about the honeymoon or even acknowledged that I had a wedding. While I endured the riveting conversation about her grocery shopping habits, the contents of refrigerator and her high school reunion, I couldn’t help but wonder what had happened to her. She used to be a person that could have an intelligent conversation on almost any topic yet now was at a loss as to how to hold any conversation at all.

I hate that feeling when you speak to that person after a few months and while they are yammering on you are wondering to yourself, “Why am I still putting up the pretense of being friends with you? We have nothing in common and you bore me to tears.” And just like that you decide to break up with them. You don’t tell the person you just fade to black. Although sometimes they come back and haunt you and then you feel like a complete dick for writing them off. Uh, or so I am told.

Anyway, I hope that you didn’t all mentally break up with me in my absence. I… uh… just needed some space, you know? It wasn’t you… it was me. I actually started about 20 posts I just never finished them. Some of them are actually really funny. Like the time the mafia bought E and I drinks. Yes, it’s true WE DRANK BLOOD MONEY! Or the time I got a giant glass of water dumped on me while I was doing my flash dance impersonation. Oh, and who could forget the first Christmas that P and I spent together. Yeah, that was great. You would have loved those stories… maybe one day I will tell them.

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